Sunday, January 20, 2019

Part Four - Revenge, Reunion, and Restoration

Chapter Twenty-Four - The Battle Within

Hesperus II
Tamarind March, Federated Commonwealth
7 May 3054

Joshua stood on the tarmac of the Defiance Industries Spaceport and looked upward. In the crisp cold night of the Myoo Mountains, he could see thousands of stars, but in a still unfamiliar pattern.

“I didn’t realize stargazing was a hobby of yours?” said Gwen, walking up with two mugs of some warm beverage.

“It’s not really.” Said Joshua, taking the offered mug. “But it’s easy to imagine ancient peoples looking up and wondering what might be out there. That curiosity has long since been lost as we now know what’s out here. Stars, planets, war, death, blood, and fire.”

“Dining on ashes, are we?”

“Every night since I sent the Dark Rangers on their mission, I’ve come out here and looked up at the sky, praying in my own way that I would see the tell-tale sign of a dropship exhaust trail. Every night it doesn’t come. All I get are rumors, tales of how the Rangers met their end on Northwind.”

“Faith is a hard thing to maintain in this universe.” Said Gwen grimly.

“It hasn’t seemed too difficult for you.” Said Joshua. “Convinced as you are that we would reunite and that all would be as it once was.”

“It’s not as easy as you think with you out here every night pining for a woman who will likely never return.” Said Gwen. She watched as Joshua’s face darkened. “I’m sorry to be so blunt. But it’s the truth. Don’t think me cruel or heartless. Nothing pains me more than seeing you like this. I want to see you happy, and I wonder if she’s ever once made you that way.”

“She did once.”

“And then the universe intervened. O’Malley and his brutality. Took what had undoubtedly been a wonderful lively human being and destroyed her from within.”

“Not too unlike our people. It was once so easy. I was a cadet, a soldier. I did as I was told. I knew what I wanted, and where to get it. Now I am left with burdens and decisions on who lives and who dies. And there’s nothing but questions and doubts before me.”

“The burdens of leadership. You were always destined for that.”

“Was I? My father seemed to have plenty of others in mind for it.”

“That’s a lie and you know it. Javier was a tool of your father’s, nothing more. An enemy created for you to fight against. Your rivalry with him was artificial, created by your father because he knew you. He knew you needed an enemy. You’ve always needed an enemy, Joshua, something to fight against. It’s what made you into the man you’ve become. But with Lisa, there is no enemy, at least not one you can kill with a sword or a gun or a battlemech. That’s why you’re lost. Maybe this one you can’t save. Maybe you can’t fix what has been broken this time. You, of all people, should know there are battles that can be won and there are battles that cannot be. When you face the latter, you withdraw.”

“Now you tell me to give up?” asked Joshua incredulously. “Two months ago it was I want to compete on an even playing field with her. Which is it, Gwen?”

“I did want to compete. That was sincere, but I heard the same ‘rumors’ you did. They aren’t rumors, Joshua. They’re reports from our intelligence services, researched, verified.”

“You should know of all people that intelligence work is often best guesses.”

“But they’re not shots in the dark. The Rangers aren’t coming back,” said Gwen, “and they aren’t bringing Lisa to you.”

“Regardless of their fate, what if she’s still alive?”

“Northwind is a big planet.”

“I can’t get the image of her out of my mind, begging for our help. Asking my forgiveness. Asking for Daniel’s.”

“Forgiveness seems to be the core of this. You love her. She loved you. That’s not in question here. But can you forgive her? Can you forgive yourself and move on? You are the leader, Joshua. You are the commander of the Star Swords. You are Khan of what remains of Clan Wolverine. The Clan needs you. The Swords need you. The galaxy needs you.” Gwen paused. “And I need you. What’s it going to be? More of this same morose pining for what once was? Or you going to live in the now with me and all the duties destiny has thrust upon you?”

Joshua looked at her intently. “You really are so much more than the trophy I once thought you.”
“So what’s your choice? The past or the present? The cadet or the Khan? Her or me?” Gwen looked at Joshua patiently, expecting an answer.

Hesperus II
Tamarind March, Federated Commonwealth
8 May 3054

Gwen sat up at the sound outside. “What the....” She sat up and moved over to the window. She opened the curtain and looked out over the spaceport in the early morning light. “God, it’s early.”
Joshua stirred in the bed. “We did have a late night.” He murmured sleepily.

Gwen walked back over to the bed. “That we did.” She leaned over and kissed him. “It’s good to see the real Joshua again. Not the lost soul I’ve been witness to these many months.”

“You drive a hard bargain.”

“Not so hard I think.” She reached under the covers to tease him playfully. “Unfortunately, the other half of what I argued last night comes into play. The Khan, the commander is needed. Something’s up. A lot of activity at the spaceport this morning. Unusually so.”

As if on cue, the vidphone rang.

“Damn, do I have to answer that?” grumbled Joshua, clearly enjoying her touch.

“Of course, you do.”

Joshua sat up and hit the receiver. Daisaku’s face appeared in the viewscreen. “Good morning, sleepy head. We’ve gotten new orders.”

“Have we?” said Joshua, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

“Yeah, Victor is redeploying us at last.”

“To where? The Liao front or the Conspiracy front?”

“Neither. We’re going home. Seems there’s some hullabaloo going on behind Clan lines. Making the Prince nervous. He wants us back on New Belfast ASAP. I’ve already taken the liberty of preparing the 2nd regiment for departure.”

“Alright, I’ll be there shortly. Let me shower, shave, and get dressed. Messer out.” He hit the disconnect button and sat up.

“As I suspected, duty calls.” Said Gwen. She pulled him into her arms as he stood up. “You know, the shower’s big enough for two.”

“A minute ago it was duty. Now it’s….well, you’re insatiable, you know that.”

“You don’t seem to mind.”

“We’d best arrange someone to watch Daniel.” Said Joshua, changing the subject.

“I think he’s still asleep. I haven’t heard anything from his room.”

“Still, as you say, duty calls. Someone needs to watch him.”

Gwen let out her breath. “Ok, I’ll call your sister. I’m sure Marian would not be happy to learn what happened between us last night.”

“I suspect not.” Said Joshua. Gwen went to the vidphone as Joshua slipped away into the bathroom.

---

The pair went out and got into a jeep. A few minutes later, they arrived at the base headquarters to find it at a state of alert. “What the hell?” said Joshua to no one in particular. He spotted Ryan headed out towards the mech hangers. “Ryan, what’s going on?”

“Unidentified dropship just popped in at a pirate point at L-1. They’re burning in fast.”

“Hostile?”

“Unknown.”

“Just one ship? Hardly much of a threat.” Said Gwen. Joshua and her left Ryan and headed inside to the command center.

“Daisaku, scramble fighters.” Ordered Joshua.

“Already done. This was unexpected.”

“I’d say. L-1? They came in close.”

“Yeah, they’ll touch down in less than 3 hours. We’re trying to hail them.”

Below Joshua, Daisaku, and Gwen, the communications techs were doing just that. “Unidentified dropship, we have you on our scope. Please identify yourself or we will regard you as hostile.”

“Hello, Star Swords.” Came a somewhat cheerful reply.

“Logan?” said Joshua in a bit of disbelief. He moved down to the technician’s console and picked up a headset. “Logan? That you?”

“Ah, General. Nice to hear your voice. Yes, it’s me. Sorry for the scare. We smashed up our IFF transponder so you wouldn’t think us a Conspiracy ship.”

Joshua let out his breath. Behind him, Daisaku gave the order. “Stand down from yellow alert. Recall all fighters.”

Joshua looked at Gwen as he asked his next question with great anxiety. “Do you have a package for me?”

“I do.” Said Logan. “But you may not like what you’re getting. I’m sorry, Joshua. O’Malley got to her first. She’s alive, but I can’t vouch for her mental state.”

“You did your best, I’m sure.” Said Joshua, putting down the headset. He walked over to Gwen.
“Fate has interesting timing.” Said Gwen, anticipating his next comment. “But this doesn’t change anything.”

“Doesn’t it?” said Joshua grimly.

---

Roughly three hours later, Joshua headed for the spaceport as the Dark Ranger’s stolen dropship made its landing approach. He was joined by Gwen, Ryan, and Amanda. Gwen stayed close by his side, taking Joshua in hand.

“My worst nightmare come to life. As damaged as she was after Robert’s affections, I can only imagine what might be left after Richard’s gotten a hold of her.” He mused aloud. He shook off Gwen in disgust. “This is the price of my sins. I should be the one coming out of that dropship broken asunder. Not her. Not Lisa.”

Gwen made no effort to contradict him. She stood by silently as the massive Union class dropship touched down on the tarmac with a final roar of its engines.

The dropship bay door opened and out walked Logan’s Nightmare. Joshua whistled in amazement at the sight of it.

“They certainly took a pounding.” said Ryan. “That’s some serious battle damage.”

“So few…” commented Amanda. “They were a full company. Only six or is it seven remain?”

“General, you’re here?” said Logan from Nightmare over his mech’s loudspeakers. The massive Awesome came to a stop near the assembled Star Swords. Logan disembarked and climbed down to meet them in person.

“What happened?” demanded Joshua.

“It was a trap from the get go.” Said Logan. “We evaded pieces of it but you see the result. Our mechs smashed up and only about half of us made it back. Lisa got caught in it too. O’Malley captured her, tortured her. Physically, she’s got some wounds still to heal, burns and cuts and the like. Nothing major or life-threatening there. But her mind? She’s not said a word since we left Northwind. She’s awake. Seems aware, but nothing.”

“I want to see her.”

“She’ll be out shortly. We wanted to get the heavy equipment clear of the tarmac.”  Logan looked past Joshua to see an ambulance pull up. “Ah, good, they’re here.”

“We thought you might have wounded, especially after your comments en route.” Said Ryan.

“We do. Aside from Lisa, there’s another who could use some attention.”

Dr. Adam Jefferson stepped out of the ambulance with a couple of medics and started towards the dropship.  A small group of people came out. Joshua recognized only one of them: Javier. Joshua noted that Javier had his arm in a sling. Also with them was a medical gurney.

“Looks like Lisa’s not the only part of this reunion.” Mused Joshua. He advanced to meet them.
“Yeah.” Said Gwen, following behind.

“Lisa is in the gurney.” Said Logan, stating the obvious.

Jefferson and his medics moved over to assist the injured. As he saw who his patient was, Jefferson staggered back. Joshua rushed over to help him.

“Doctor, are you okay?” Jefferson didn’t answer, and Joshua followed his gaze to the form on the gurney.

“It…..it’s Lisa.” Said Jefferson. It was at that point that Joshua realized he’d not told the doctor of the chance she might be on the Ranger’s dropship when it returned.

Joshua looked down at his wife. She was awake, eyes open. They looked first at Jefferson, then at Joshua, but she said nothing. Made no reaction, no sign of recognition.

“Lisa?” said Joshua hesitantly. Still, no answer.

“I’ll need to evaluate her as soon as possible.” Said Jefferson.

“Of course.”

“I’ll need medical evaluation as well.” Said Javier. “Took a round in the arm. Now I can’t move it or feel it.”

Jefferson moved away from Lisa for the moment and quickly examined Javier. “This is not good. Quickly, take this man to the infirmary at once. Lady Lisa also.”

Joshua simply stood there as they wheeled her away. Logan looked at Joshua. “I’m sorry. We tried.”
“I know.” Came the quiet reply.

Joshua looked at Gwen. Neither said a word to the other, but their faces spoke volumes. Both had a look of uncertainty, fearful for the future. Gwen could read the look of pain on Joshua’s face, the shock of seeing Lisa in that stretcher must have been incredible. He moved away from her and headed for the jeep, silent. Rather than follow him, she watched him go, with Ryan and Amanda. They drove off, following behind the ambulance as it sped towards the Defiance Industries Hospital.

---

The ambulance arrived at the hospital and the people within spilled out. Jefferson rushed Lisa inside to examine her, leaving the worried outside to wait.

“How did she end up on Northwind?” asked Amanda.

“I stranded her there.” Said Joshua bitterly, holding back his tears. “When we tracked her to Oliver, I froze the joint account in hopes that it would strand her on that world. It didn’t. I was too late, she was already on her way to her next destination when her money ran out. So she got trapped on Northwind instead, right within the clutches of that monster’s brother.”

“It’s a big planet, Joshua. She should have been perfectly safe as long as she kept a low profile.” Said Ryan.

“She didn’t.” said Logan. “She was working with Agent Bairn’s insurrection when we found her. She was one of Javier’s aides, I guess. You rarely saw them apart.”

“Did she know who he was?” asked Joshua.

“I’m not sure I know what you mean.”

“Javier is an old rival of mine. We go way back.”

“If you want me to tell you Javier had something to do with her being hurt, I can’t answer that. My impression is that he did not. He helped us break her out of O’Malley’s prison. Took a round in the arm and will probably lose that arm for his trouble.”

A few minutes later, Gwen arrived at the hospital with Nathan and Kyle.

“I meant to ask. How’s the leg?” asked Nathan of Gwen.

“As well as it’s going to get. I have almost full use of it. I see you’ve seen some action.” she said.
“Yeah, a lot. Our rebellion is finished…for now.” said Nathan, tugging on Gwen’s tunic. “A Star Sword uniform.”

“I’m their new intelligence liaison. Their old one joined the Conspiracy, so they had an opening.”
“Congratulations.” said Nathan.

“Thanks.”

“How’s Kyle?” she asked of Nathan’s companion.

Kyle shook his head. “Not well. I gave so much and have nothing to show for it.”

“I’m sorry.” Said Gwen.

Defiance Industries Hospital
Hesperus II
Tamarind March, Federated Commonwealth
8 May 3054

By mid-afternoon, word of Lisa’s return had spread through the Sword encampment like wildfire. Fearful of Lisa’s fragile mental health, Dr. Jefferson refused any visitors that weren’t family, which basically meant Joshua, Daniel, Marian, and Miranda were the only ones allowed to see her.

Gwen waited in the waiting room, watching over Daniel, who had chosen to fall asleep on one of the waiting room chairs. Javier was also on this floor, recovering from having his arm amputated. A myomer prosthetic was being crafted for him, but it would be a few days before it would be attached. Losing his arm put him in an understandably foul mood. Not that Gwen really wanted to see him anyway.

She hadn’t seen Joshua since that morning, he had been with Lisa all day. He hadn’t eaten or anything, and she was growing worried. Nearly all the senior officers of the Swords were there: Daisaku, Ryan, Amanda, Erik, and Michelle. Joshua’s sister was also there.

Miranda finally came out, dragging a weary Joshua out with her. Daisaku walked over and joined them. Gwen picked up the sleeping Daniel and walked over beside her friend.

As his group of friends began to surround Joshua, he came out of his dazed state. His first action was to reach over and grasp Gwen’s free hand. Gwen was surprised that he did that, as were a number of other people. In all the chaos of the day, no one had informed them of what had transpired the night before between Gwen and Joshua.

“Dr. Jefferson,” began Joshua, “conducted an analysis of Lisa’s condition. He’s not sure what’s going on or why exactly she’s in this semi-catatonic state. Given the amount of emotional trauma she experienced, he thinks her brain has simply shut down. It’s like she’s an infant again, her memories buried deep underneath. He thinks she’ll recover, but it will take time. He’s also recommending a return to familiar haunts. He says that ought to help.”

“Good thing Victor ordered us home then.” Said Daisaku.

“Agreed.”

“Let’s get some rest, Joshua.” Said Gwen. “There’s nothing any of us can do here.”

“Yeah, let us drive you back to the base. Get you some sleep.” Said Ryan. “I’m sure Miranda or Marian will call if something changes.” He looked to Gwen. “You coming?” He asked, correctly interpreting Joshua’s sudden show of affection.

“No, I’m going to stay for a bit. See Javier. You go on ahead.” She turned and headed towards Javier’s room, deciding in the end that she needed to make a visit with her old ISF comrade after all. She paused at Lisa’s room and looked inside. Lisa was watching the door and could see her. Their eyes met, but Lisa did not give her usual look of death, the one Gwen had gotten so used to seeing from her on Northwind. Just a passive stare.

Gwen continued on to Javier’s room. He was lying in bed, staring at the ceiling.

“What she undergoes mentally, I seem to undergo physically.” He grumbled as Gwen walked in, clearly referring to Lisa. “First this.” He ran a finger down his scarred face. “Now my arm too.”
“I’m sorry, Javier.”

He glared at Gwen angrily. “All because of him and his.”

“That doesn’t sound like you. On Dieron, you seemed rather eager to let bygones be bygones.” Said Gwen. “Forgive and forget.”

“How can I forget when I see it every morning in the mirror?”

“Javier, you didn’t have anything to do with what happened to Lisa?”

“Think so little of me, quiaff?” he glared at her. “Why would I do that?”

“I don’t know what to think. Except that the man I knew on Dieron was very eager to find himself here among his people. Now you speak with bitter tones and anger at Joshua. Like before. Like the old days when we first came to the Combine. Which is the real you, Javier?”

“Maybe I’m just finding that out myself.” He looked at Gwen’s uniform. “Am I getting one of those?”

“I presume…if you ask.”

“And a command like you have? I see the Kommandant rank on your lapel. A battalion command? All for what? Spreading your legs for him while his wife was playing at rebel on Northwind?”
“That’s enough, Javier.” Said Gwen firmly.

“Hit the mark, quiaff? I guess that answers my question about where you stand with him. I suppose that’s all up in the air now with Lisa back among her own.”

“Not as much as you might think.”

“Oh, I’m not so sure. When it really comes down to it, do you really think he’s not going to remember that you are as much to blame for Lisa’s condition as anyone? You came between them. It was your plan to seduce Joshua. Your orders were to kill him, not fuck him. I knew you wouldn’t obey, but to do what you did…that was a surprise.”

“You knew my feelings. You’ve known them since New Vision.”

“Yes, yes, I have.” He said bitterly. “And even now with his wife returned, you still conspire to keep him. Go! Leave me be. You’re one of the last people I want to see right now.”

Star Sword Headquarters
Hesperus II
Tamarind March, Federated Commonwealth
8 May 3054

Despite their efforts to hide the shock of the day by acting normal, the Swords officers were quiet during dinner, eating together but alone in their thoughts. Each had their own separate hopes and worries about Lisa’s return. Joshua was the first to get up. “Well, as you suggested, I should get some sleep.” He departed and headed for his quarters.

Gwen was waiting for him. “I should tell you to leave.”  He said angrily.

“Leave you here alone? After what you’ve been through today? Don’t shut me out, not now.”

“I’ll be fine.”

“Bullshit.  You’re scared. You’re worried. Hell, I’m scared and worried.”

“For her? Or for you?”

Gwen let her hands clench into fists at the accusation, Javier’s words echoing in her mind. “You took my hand at the hospital, Joshua. Not your sister, not one of your friends and comrades. You turned to me for consolation. What happened to that?”

“I’m sorry.” Said Joshua. “That was unkind of me. You wanted to see the old Joshua, the strong commander, the Khan, the lover again. And you might have if the world hadn’t turned upside down two or three times today. The lost soul is all I am anymore, because the other half of me lies in that bed at the hospital.”

“You’re stronger than that. You know it and I know it.”

“I didn’t realize how much of an affect seeing her like that was going to have.”

“It was a shock, but it does change nothing. She is still broken and the enemy that makes her so is not one you can fight and defeat in all the ways you know. Can you win this battle? Can you save her, Joshua?”

“I once asked those questions about you, after your brother died.”

“That was different. I was damaged, yes, hurting. But I was also whole in body and mind. Lisa has no such advantage. Her mind is shattered. Stop living in the fairy tale, Joshua. Love isn’t going to save her. This is the real world. I’m here, she’s not, regardless of what lies in that hospital bed.”

She moved closer. “If there was a way I could take this pain from you, I would. Joshua, what I say and what I do are not the calculating moves of some seductress. My feelings for you are genuine, and it does hurt to see you hurt and it does hurt to see you lost. I want you to find yourself again and be the man I saw this morning before that dropship touched down. The man I saw on Dieron fighting and leading an outnumbered and outmatched group of warriors to victory. The man I know you are and can be.”

Joshua sat down and put his head in his hands. His weariness seemed to radiate out in waves around the room. Gwen sat next to him. “Come on, Josh, let allow sleep to take away pain at least for a while. When you awake I’ll be here. You were always there for me when I needed you. It’s time I returned the favor.”

Star Sword Headquarters
Hesperus II
Tamarind March, Federated Commonwealth
9 May 3054

Gwen stirred as the early morning light came in through the window. In a strange echo of the previous morning, she saw Joshua looking out upon the nearby dropship tarmac from the window. Gwen sat up from where she had laid down next to Joshua. Unlike the night before, there was no romantic interlude, no lovemaking between them. Gwen had not even gotten underneath the covers.
Joshua noticed her stir and turned. “I did not mean to wake you. I had…I needed to collect my thoughts.”

Gwen rubbed her eyes. “Oh?” she asked sleepily. “Any conclusions?”

“You have been a good friend these past months, Gwen. Your counsel is sound and wise. I am glad you are here with me. You spoke of being decisive, of living in the now. And you were right. You spoke of there being no enemy in this battle that I could defeat. On that however, I’m not sure that you were correct.”

“What do you mean?”

“I don’t know what demon holds Lisa prisoner, what mental trauma, what emotional turmoil keeps her like this. I don’t know how I can fight it. But I have to try. She is my wife. She is the mother of my child, and I do love her. I may not win. I may gain nothing. But some battles must be fought anyway. I could not live with myself if I did nothing to help her. She is here in the now and I have made my decision.”

“I thought you might come to that. You really have come back to yourself just these past few days. One thing I’ve always admired in you is your tenacity. You just keep at it. It’s what’s made you as strong as you are.” She paused. “It was something you taught to me. The way you kept at it when we were cadets, regardless of what your father threw at you. And the way you always refused to give up when it came to me. Daniel killed himself, and you were there and you fought for me. Javier came along and you still fought to win me. I learned from that. It’s why I’ve been so determined in my own quest to win you back. It’s why I fell in love with you all those years ago and it’s why I still love you. Very well, Joshua. If this is your choice, so be it. If you succeed, well, I’ll figure something out. If you fail, I’ll still be here.”

“You understand, I hope that in order for this to work…”

“….we keep things platonic.” Finished Gwen. “Not a problem.”

“I’m glad you are so understanding.” Said Joshua.

“Understanding? Perhaps more than you know. You have to be you. Do what you must, and I will be by your side no matter what.”

Rasalhague
Wolf Clan Occupation Zone, Free Rasalhague Republic
13 May 3054

“I am outraged!” yelled Khan Elias Crichell of Clan Jade Falcon. “How dare you dictate to us how we should conduct our internal affairs. You and your Warden ways are trying to protect one of the most powerful weapon the Inner Sphere holds against us. This is no attempt to bring order to our two Clans. You are using your position to bully us.”

“You exaggerate, Khan Jade Falcon.” Retorted the accused ilKhan Ulric Kerensky. “The Star Swords are little more than thieves. Clever thieves, but thieves nonetheless.” He let the not-so-subtle insult glide off his lips. It was, of course, the Falcons who had lost their own personnel and equipment to those very thieves.

The Clan front had been largely quiet for nearly 18 months now. The Jade Falcons had busied themselves in retaking worlds lost to the Federated Commonwealth in Operation: Counterstrike, but had stopped short of retaking three of them: Twycross, Evcilier, and New Belfast. Dal Pryde and his 2nd Jaegers had initially been denied the glory of retaking any world occupied by the Star Swords; Now the rest of the Clan steered clear of the Swords. Probing attacks and raids both by the Falcons and their rivals had proven the Star Sword defenses too strong for a quick conquest. But things were changing. The Star Swords were away fighting in the so-called Conspiracy War. And the same leaders who had once denied Pryde his chance had since come around to his way of thinking. Khan Crichell’s hyperbole was proof that he was now a political ally of Pryde in regards to the Star Swords. Soon, Pryde would be once more on New Belfast, once more facing off with the hated Not-Named he’d failed to kill all those years ago in the Periphery.

Or so he hoped. Now there was a new complication. The demand of ilKhan Ulric Kerensky, leader of all the Clans, for a temporary cessation of hostilities between the Clans and the Inner Sphere. There would be no more raids. No more attempts to probe the Sword defenses.

“They are more than thieves, ilKhan. They are devils of our own kind.” Argued Crichell. Pryde smiled. He knew what was coming next. “You know the story. The Not-Named Clan once dared to defy Kerensky’s great vision. For that, they were destined for destruction. But the Wolf Clan, the Clan appointed to carry out that task, failed, and failed miserably. Your clan, Ulric. Members of the Not-Named Clan escaped, fleeing into the Near Periphery to hide for centuries, guarding well their skills and talents, and long remembering the vengeance they swore against us. Now they have come forth to challenge us, under the guise of a unit known as the Star Swords. We have called the Bloodrite against them, but now you tie our hands to do even this. If you will not allow us this task, then I challenge you and your Clan to finish the task they once started.”

“Your ravings are uncalled for, Khan Crichell.” rebuked ilKhan Kerensky. “You have no solid evidence of the Star Swords connection to the Not-Named. No genetic evidence.”

“The evidence is obvious. They fight with Clan tactics, use our customs. Their names, listen to their names. Messer, Iolair, Hayakusora, and so forth. These were the bloodlines we once had eradicated. I need no scientific proof when the sheer weight of the circumstantial evidence points to only one conclusion. The Not-Named have returned and they aid the Inner Sphere as they once pledged they would.”

“You fear that old superstition much, Khan Crichell, if you bring it to this forum. The Not-Named were long since eradicated and those that escaped us two centuries ago were destroyed utterly by your own Clan six years ago. That battle is over.”

“Khan Crichell’s personal crusade is of no relevance to the rest of us.” Said Khan Natalie Breen of the Steel Vipers. “As for the rest of us, only through combat do our warriors become strong. Only through battle do we filter out the weak and unfit. We will not allow your edict to stand. Peace is unnatural to us. We must fight, despite the cost, or we will become weaker than you claim these battles make us.” The murmurs of the chamber affirmed her claims. Ulric shook his head. This was not unexpected.

“I call for a vote to rescind the ilKhan’s edict.” Said Crichell.

“Although it pains me to side with Khan Jade Falcon, I will second that motion.” Said Breen.

The vote was soon taken and Kerensky’s order was struck down. With their business concluded, the Khans departed. Kerensky himself returned to his quarters.

“I knew it would not stand, but I expected widespread disobedience instead of political retaliation.” Mused Kerensky to his aide, saKhan Phelan Ward, an Inner Sphere warrior adopted into the Wolf Clan.

“What then are we to do about the Star Swords? The Falcons will surely make plans to strike at them once they return to our area of space.”

“I do not know if Crichell’s belief in their origins is true or not.” Said Ulric.

“Crichell fears them. You can see it in his eyes when he speaks of them. No unit has ever done that to that man.”

“That worm of a mechwarrior Pryde is beginning to poison the whole of Clan Jade Falcon. They are all infected with his obsession for the Not-Named.”

“Perhaps we could take a lesson from him.”

Ulric looked at him quizzically. “What do you mean, Phelan?”

“He accused us of failing to destroy the Not-Named. Perhaps we should finish the task.” Phelan smiled. “As you suspect, Crichell will send Pryde to do the deed. What if, when Pryde begins his attack, we are there and demand Trial for the right to destroy the Swords ourselves? After all, if they are Not-Named, it was our job to begin with.”

Ulric nodded. “I see. If Pryde wins, his forces shall be weakened against a determined foe. If we win, Pryde goes home empty-handed and the glory is ours. This plan has merit. See to it.”

Outbound
Hesperus II
Tamarind March, Federated Commonwealth
15 May 3054

A half dozen dropships roared away from the blue-green ball that was Hesperus II. Joshua smiled as he saw the planet disappear behind him.

“Next stop, New Belfast.” said Joshua.

Gwen was beside him. “Logan called a minute ago. He sends his regards and luck. His group’s already got a new mission, some sort of exchange with the Draconis Combine. Something Prince Victor arranged.”

“Well, I wish him well. I owe him for Lisa.”

“He came through. Your faith did not fail you after all.” Gwen swooned for a second, causing Joshua to reach back and grab her.

“You okay? What was that about?”

“It’s stupid.” Said Gwen weakly. “I always get dizzy during launch. I’ve had this issue for ages now. I think I’ll head back to our room now and lie down.”

“Okay, I’ll join you later.”

Joshua watched as Gwen walked off. He then returned his view to the receding planet.

The Star Swords were now en route home. Their time on Hesperus had allowed Joshua to complete his plans of finishing the 2nd Star Swords and reorganizing the 1st. Each Swords regiment was now formally made up of two mech battalions, in many cases filled out with brand new Inner Sphere designs. Some had been refitted to carry Clan weapons, but for the most part, the Star Swords had lost their novelty of being a fully Clan outfitted unit. Each regiment was then rounded out with a battalion of mixed aerospace, armor, and infantry support forces. Joshua retained command temporarily of the 1st regiment, while Daisaku commanded the 2nd. Joshua was hoping to fill the command slot with one of his officers, but he’d held out over promoting either Ryan Smith or Michael Koren to the position. His true hope was to reinstate Lisa at the command.

That was where Joshua’s thoughts wandered at that moment. He knew, that despite it all, the Swords were not yet whole. With Lisa still under close medical watch within the dropship’s infirmary and Juan Miranda gallivanting about the Conspiracy zone somewhere, there were still pieces missing.
“But we are on the road to recovery,” Joshua thought optimistically. “There are still pieces missing, pieces that no factory can replace. Juan, you betrayed us for an outdated hatred. Now I can’t help but wonder if you don’t find the cause you left us to support less desirable than the one you left behind? Your lover dead at the very hands of those you call allies. And speaking of lovers, my own wife lies catatonic in a hospital bed. She eats when she’s fed. Does her business when taken to the bathroom. But she says nothing and makes no sign of recognition with anyone. How can I fight this battle? How can I win her back from this oblivion O’Malley has consigned her to? Is there anything left inside this seemingly empty shell of the woman I once pledged to love forever? The woman I betrayed.

“Gwen says this is about forgiveness and once again, she’s right. But most religious traditions attach the idea of penance to forgiveness, some act of contrition to show that guilt and repentance are sincere. This battle is my penance. At least, even if I fail, I cannot say I did not try to save her. Maybe then, I can come to forgive myself for what this confusion within my heart has driven me to do.”

Zenith Station
Sudeten system
Tamar March, Federated Commonwealth
20 June 3054

The Stellar Glory felt empty as Gwen made her way to the infirmary and to Lisa. Daniel struggled some in her arms. “Oh, stop it, Daniel.” muttered Gwen. “I’m taking you to see your mom.” Daniel didn’t seem to hear Gwen’s words as they wandered into the infirmary. It was dark and Gwen flipped the light switch. As the dark vanished from the room, Gwen’s eyes focused on an empty bed.

“What the.....” Without warning, there was a hand over her mouth and another arm pinned hers behind her back. That caused her to drop Daniel, who hit the floor with a thud. He immediately began crying.

“Who are you and where am I?” snarled a woman’s voice in Gwen’s ear. “You’re one of O’Malley’s men, aren’t you?”

Gwen slammed her elbow back to get loose. The blow knocked the wind out of her captor and Gwen jerked herself free. She scooped up Daniel from the floor and backed away from the woman who’d grabbed her.

“Doctor!” called Gwen. Gwen stared at her, fearful that she’d find the same rage she saw in Lisa that night at Napineo’s prison. To her surprise and relief, she did not. Lisa looked more confused and scared than angry or vengeful. But this was not the catatonic zombie that Gwen had come to expect. Lisa was awake, alert, and speaking, clearly self-aware and aware of her surroundings.

“You can’t run.” said Lisa. “You’ll answer my questions, or I’ll be forced to.....”

“Calm down, Lisa.” Said Gwen. “You’re aboard the Stellar Glory, one of the Star Sword’s dropships. You’re among friends here.”

“Who are you?”

“I’m Gwen. I’m a friend.”

“What’s all the commotion about?” said another voice: Javier. He had been in the next room, doing therapy exercises with his new myomer arm, and came over at the sounds of Gwen and Lisa’s scuffle.
Lisa turned. “Javier!” she cried with excitement, leaping over to him and throwing her arms around him. “Oh, God. O’Malley, he captured me. I thought...”

“She recognizes you!” said Gwen with surprise.

“Obviously.” He said with a bit of surprise. “You’d best call Dr. Jefferson and Joshua. They’re both on the station right now.” He turned to Lisa. “Lisa?”

“Why do you call me that, Javier? I’m Justice remember?”

“Ok. I do remember.” Said Javier as Gwen moved to the intercom. “It just seems that you don’t.”

“Excuse me?”

“Never mind. You’d best sit back down and we’ll get this sorted out.”
---

Five minutes later, Javier had gotten Lisa back into her bed. Dr. Jefferson and Joshua both came into the room. “She’s awake!” they said in unison. “She spoke.”

“Hell, she attacked me.” Said Gwen. “She seems to have a habit of that.” She added sardonically.

Jefferson moved over to her, checking her vitals. “Anything of note?”

“She didn’t recognize Gwen.” Said Javier. “Or her surroundings. Her attack on Gwen was just an act of fear. But she did recognize me.”

“She also mentioned O’Malley at one point.” Added Gwen. “Unfortunately, she remembers him too.”
Joshua stepped forward. “Who are you?” asked Lisa to him. Those words hit him like an artillery round. Dr. Jefferson pulled Joshua back. Javier stepped over to the side of Lisa’s bed.

“Justice, what’s the last thing you remember?” asked Javier.

“I remember going to the prison to rescue the captives. There was a battle. It was a trap. We fled. The rest is a blur. I don’t remember anything else, other than a white room. I was tied to the ceiling.” She shuddered and went silent.

“What about before that?” asked Jefferson. “On Northwind? The rebellion you were with?”

“I remember the rebellion. Nathan, Kyle, you.”

“Do you remember Gwen?” added Javier. “She was with us for a time. You helped me rescue her once.”

Lisa shook her head. “No. I’m drawing a blank there.”

“Anything earlier? Do you remember your home? What are your parent’s names?” asked Jefferson.
Lisa closed her eyes as if to focus. “No. I can’t.” She stammered. “I only remember joining the rebellion. Fighting on Northwind. Fighting against O’Malley. There has to be more. Why don’t I remember?”

“Calm down, Justice.” Said the doctor. Using her pseudonym seemed awkward to Jefferson. “These things take time. You’ve already surprised us today.”

“What do you mean?”

“You’ve been out of it for some time.” Said Joshua. “We were worried you’d never come back.”

“I’m here now. Some of me anyway.” She said.

Joshua let out a little chuckle. “At least your sense of humor is intact.”

“You get some rest, Lisa.” Said Dr. Jefferson, slipping out of habit on her name.

“That’s not my name.” said Lisa, with angry defiance. Her reaction surprised everyone.

“Calm down.” Interjected Javier. “That’s the name you gave Kyle when you worked at his bar. Justice is the name you used to trick O’Malley.”

“I don’t remember any of that.”

“It’s okay. It’ll come back to you, I’m sure. Let’s give her a chance to rest.” He motioned towards the door. Gwen, Joshua, and Javier headed outside with Daniel in tow.

“This is consistent with her previous pathology. She’s moved from catatonia to amnesia, but both consistent with the level of mental and emotional trauma she’s sustained. In a sense, this is what she underwent after her rape, only greatly amplified.”

Javier stood up and walked over to Dr. Jefferson. “Well, Doc, she seems to remember me and a few things that we shared in common. I’d like to talk with her a while, see if I can’t crack the shell a little.”

“Be careful, Javier. She’s subconsciously blocking out memories because they’re too painful for her to remember. You don’t want to push her too hard or too fast. You saw how strongly she reacted to my calling her by her real name. It’s as if her mind is actively rejecting those memories. Forcing her out of her comfort zone might cause more harm than good.”

“I’m sure you can observe me and make sure I don’t cross the line.”

Joshua put his hand on Javier’s shoulder. “I never thought I’d see the day when I would come to rely on you for help. But if you can help her, please do it. I’ll be on the bridge.”

“Alright,” said Dr. Jefferson, “let’s see what she does remember. We won’t grill her too much, but we might as well get started now. It may, if nothing else, calm her down a bit.”

Joshua walked away as the two men set about their work. Gwen quickly ran up beside him. “Six weeks ago, Javier was spitting curses at you for all that he believes he’s suffered by your hand.”
“I know. You’ve told me. Hard to fault him a bit of anger and bitterness over losing his arm. And I did give him that scar on his face.”

“I’m not convinced he’s let that go yet.” Said Gwen. “I wouldn’t trust him if I were you.”

“Right now, he’s all I’ve got. Agent Bairn and Mr. MacDougal remained on Hesperus. She doesn’t know you. Javier’s the only one she’s shown any recognition towards. Yeah, maybe it’s a little risky. But it’s all I’ve got. I’m going to take it.”

“There’s your faith again. But this isn’t Logan. This is a man who once tried to kill you during your Trial of Position. Don’t forget that. He hasn’t.”

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